What Do I Do Now?

There are many myths about anger that may make it harder to change habits and behaviors.  There may also be a question as to whether you are a real rageaholic.  You don’t have to decide if you are a rager or how bad of a rager you might be to take steps toward changing your ways. Most people would be glad to find a way to live a happier life.  The principles and techniques discussed in Anger Busting 101 and The Anger Busting Workbook can also be applied to make most marriages more rewarding, regardless of the amount of rage in the relationship. The ABC method helps you develop successful strategies for dealing with people who have had it with your rageful behavior.  Good luck!

When stressed, it is important not to resort to Anger, Blame and Criticism. 
Instead, try practicing the new ABCs -  Abstaining, Believing and Communicating.
Learn the basics of the first set of rules (The "A's") :

                                 For Rageaholics
"A" - Abstain from these behaviors when you are angry:
# 1.    Stop speaking when angry.
# 2.    Stop staying when angry.
# 3.    Stop staring when angry.
# 4.    Stop interrupting—no matter what.
# 5.    Stop cursing—completely stop, no matter what.
# 6.    Stop name-calling, no matter what.
# 7.    Stop threatening.
# 8.    Stop pointing.
# 9.    Stop yelling, raising your voice, or talking in a mean tone.
#10.    Stop being sarcastic. Stop mocking.
#11.    Stop throwing things, slamming doors, or banging walls.
#12.    Stop all non-affectionate touching.
#13.    Stop telling “hero stories.”
#14.    Stop sighing, clucking, or rolling your eyes.
#15.    Stop criticizing. Stop lecturing.
 *As an added measure,
    Stop speeding.

                                 For Partners
"A" - Abstain from these comments:
# 1.    “Go ahead and tell me how you really feel.”
# 2.    “Tell me when you are angry. Don’t let it build up.”
# 3.    “We need to resolve this right NOW!”
# 4.    “You are always running away. You never want to talk with me.”
# 5.    “If you are going to scream at me, then I am going to scream at you.”
# 6.    “You are sick and you will never get better. Men like you only get worse over time.”
# 7.    “How can you say you love me when you treat me like that?”
# 8.    “Go ahead and hit me. I know that’s what you really want to do.”
# 9.    “You’re crazy. The things you get jealous over make no sense at all.”
#10.    “THIS IS IT. I am going to divorce you this time. No one is going to talk to me like that.”
#11.    “You will never get any better until you go to therapy and work through your issues with your father. That is what my therapist said is wrong with you.”

Learn more about managing anger before losing your life to it. Click here.